February 16, 2022 Issue, Page 6 of 8

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6 Activities February 16, 2022 Husband of three decades still supports first wife what we had. I am also afraid for us as well. I love my grand- Dear Abby of being alone. Am I overreact- child but I’m having a very hard ing about his closeness with time with this. So is my hus- DEAR ABBY: I have been her? What do I do? -- BEATEN band. I don’t know how to tell DOWN AND FED UP with my husband for more my sisters and their husbands than 30 years. We have no DEAR BEATEN DOWN: The about this. One set is pretty kids together, but he has three man you married is emotional- understanding; the other set adult children from a previous ly abusive, selfish and dishon- is extremely right-wing and marriage. All of them are in over-the-top conservative. We est. I don’t know how long this their 30s. He and his ex had a want to accept our grandchild bad breakup, and she has never scenario has been playing out, given up on him coming back but it’s as though he never re- as who he is identifying as, but to her. ally divorced his first wife. Has we are still bewildered. Thank In my opinion, he has strung he been “visiting the kids” all you for any suggestions you her along. He buys her the this time, or did it start when might have for us. -- THROWN moon and pretends our mar- the COVID quarantines began? IN TEXAS riage doesn’t exist for the “sake Start NOW to rebuild your DEAR THROWN: I don’t of seeing the kids.” We used sense of self-esteem by talk- think you should rush to share to be close, but since the pan- ing with a licensed mental this news with your sisters and demic I have learned he has health professional. Once you been going to “their house” ev- their husbands. The announce- are stronger you will be in a ment should come from your ery day before he goes to work. better position to decide what He pays her mortgage and grandchild when he is ready. does everything there for her. you want to do. If you reread As to how you and your hus- I pay our house bills because he your letter, you will notice a band should “handle” it, the needs to “support her and the glaring omission. Not once did organization PFLAG has re- kids.” you mention anything posi- cently come out with a free They have grown super close tive he does for YOU. There are publication titled, “Support- now, and recently had a grand- worse things than being alone, child. He is too involved with ing Your LGBTQ+ Grandchild.” and what you have described is her. He takes her everywhere close to it. It’s a quick and easy read, and she wants, and when I get up- you may find the information set or angry, he tells me I’m a DEAR ABBY: Our 14-year- it contains helpful. Find it at selfish, childless b-word and if old granddaughter came out pflag.org or by calling 202-467- I had kids I would understand. as a boy four months ago. The 8180. I love him, but I have reached Dear Abby is written by Abigail situation has been terrifying the point where I have no self- Van Buren, also known as Jeanne esteem. I have asked him more because he had thought about than once why he doesn’t go suicide. He was hospitalized Phillips, and was founded by her and now sees a therapist and mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Crossword back to her. He tells me I am insecure and paranoid. Abby, psychologist and is taking anx- Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com I am a smart, successful wom- iety meds. or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, an, but I am afraid to give up This has been a trying time CA 90069. Current puzzle answers Get Fuzzy Drabble Dailies Pearls Before Swine Garfield Dilbert