October 13, 2021 Issue, Page 7 of 10

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Activities October 13 , 2021 Kilt-wearing Scot endures Qneys—-Believe It or Not! repeated assaults a BABY JANE be treated as the crime it is. OF MUNDELEIN, ILLINOIS, Dear Abby Now, every time a woman does ee IS THE OLDEST PIG it, we immediately call the po- 1 ee ee EVER KEPT IN proud DEAR ABBY: I married a year ago who lice and report the crime. The Scotsman a Badiwrote my brother out-of CAPTIVITY, AND perpetrators are then shocked his will and left everything to CELESRATED HER often wears kilts. When we go and angry that they are being me. My brother carries a weap- 23RD BIRTHDAY ON out, women think nothing of FEBRUARY I, 2021. coming over and lifting his kilt, arrested for a sex crime for on and, for my family’s sake, I something they thought was have cut contact. Distant fam- which exposes him to anyone innocent fun and games. Your ily think I haven’t been fair by who has a visual advantage. column reaches many readers. separating myself from him ‘These women scream with glee With your help, we can help and not splitting the inheri- and then become physically women understand that doing tance. Am I wrong? — HEIRESS aggressive with their hands. this is unacceptable. - DOU- IN MISSOURI Ponatp GORSKE OF Frankly, I am shocked and hor- BLE STANDARD FOND DULAC, WISCONSIN, HAS rified anyone would do this. DEAR HEIRESS: You are not EATEN MORE THAN ‘The last time it happened a DEAR DOUBLE: It is no “wrong”; you are intelligent 32,340 BIG MACS INHIS woman ripped his kilt off and and prudent. Your sibling has more acceptable to lift a man’s LIFETIME! / the police became involved. repeatedly demonstrated that kilt “in the name of fun” than fe Originally, the police were it would be to pull his trousers he is nothing but trouble and going to charge my husband down. I hope any person read- he isn’t going to change. You with indecent exposure. After ing this, who didn’t have the stated that the family mem- several hours, it became clear common sense to know better, bers who are urging you be that it was the woman who as- will take note and respect the closer to an armed felon are saulted my husband. The police personal space of Scotsmen “distant.” If you are as smart as Bvrcuseotocist:SIN IRELAND HAVE UNCOVERED A then kinda laughed it off. They and ALL individuals. (It beats I think you are, you will ignore (,600-YEAR-OLD, 8-FOOT-TALL didn’t plan on doing anything finding one’s name on a sex of- their bad advice and cease con- WOODEN STATUE KNOWN AS further. We were furious. fender registry.) tact with them, too. THE 'GORTNAGCRANNAGH IDOL.” Why is there a double stan- fos . WHICH WAS PROBABLY USED DURING dard that women feel they can DEAR ABBY: My parents did Dear Abby is written by Abi- ARITUAL CEREMONY. lift a man’s kilt to expose him well financially. Mom passed gail Van Buren, also known and call it fun, yet the same away 20 years ago. My brother as Jeanne Phillips, and was empeoneaen 10-13 women would scream sexual has always been unstable. He’s founded by her mother, Pau- assault if a man lifted their a violent, abusive drug addict line Phillips. Contact Dear skirt? Women need to under- and a con artist. Dad was ex- stand that lifting a man’s kilt tremely ill during his last few P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, is sexual assault and should years. My brother abused him, CA 90069. 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