December 2, 2020 Issue, Page 8 of 10

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December 2, 2020 Activities Trust issues are remnants of Rreys—-Believe It or Not!- past toxic relationships (> 2 yourself of the “baggage” you from him again, your friend- Dear Abby are carrying, understand why ship will be OVER. And then DEAR ABBY: Marriage is you chose the men you did follow through. before, and make it easier to considered to be imperative evaluate any new relationships in my religion and culture. I'm that start to develop. DEAR ABBY: I feel horrible 29 and still not married. I have about my “first time.” It was 10 commitment and trust issues with guys. I have been in only DEAR ABBY: I have known with my boyfriend, and it hap- TieISOLA GROTTO On re dt PONZA, \TALY, my friend “Matt” for more than three relationships my entire pened in the back seat of his ARE A GERIES OF MAN-MADE CAVES 20 years. We've been close for CARVED INTO “THE VOLCANIC ROCKY A 1,100-YEAR-OLD MUMMY DiscovercD life. most of those years. car. I had always dreamed of AROUND THE FIRST CENTURY AD. IN MONGOLIA IN 2016 WAS FOUND WEARING: Every time things are going Boor WITH AN ADIDAS-LIKE DESIGN Matt is gay, and early in our my first time being special, THE ANCIENT ROMANS LIKELY USED well, I tend to self-sabotage “JHEM “TO FARM EELS Z SPECULATED To HOVE BEEN A SEAMSTRESE, and make excuses to push the friendship, we had a mutual but after realizing we didn’t “THE MUMMY WAS ALSO FOUND WITH AN. guy away. I start arguments for friend, “Gary,” who used a gay have many options, we de- EMBROIDERED BAG, A SEWING KIT, AND. FOUR COSTUMES — no reason or create problems epithet often, even though he cided the car was fine. Now I or issues that I fabricate out of knew Matt is gay. It hurt Matt, feel ashamed and guilty. Can wonripleye.com thin air. I think it has a lot to but he wasn’t comfortable do with the fact that my past speaking to Gary about it, so I you advise me? — NOT LIKE I relationships were toxic and did. Gary not only apologized IMAGINED IN TEXAS tumultuous. They were cheat- to Matt but to this day (some ers and liars. 18 years later), I haven't heard DEAR NOT: I will try. When. I have carried that baggage Gary say that word in our com- pany. did your first time happen? into my relationship with my new partner by not believing Recently, Matt has started Last weekend? Last month? a lot ofthe things he says. For using the N-word. I have told Last year? Whenever it was, example, I doubt his feelings him that not only is it disgust- it is in the past. Experience Qn HIDALGO, TEXAS, THERE I= Ole oF & KILLER BEE for me. When things are going ing and offensive, but I com- teaches us what works for us THAT WEIGHS 2,000 POUNDS, smoothly between us, I always pared it to the situation with Gary. Matt laughed it off and and what doesn’t. Learn from 122 caso nipiey emertainment ine. Distributed by Andrewe MeMoe! for UFS. take five or 10 steps back. It isn’t fair that I put him through continues to use the word with it, but don’t preoccupy yourself the wringer, but I don’t know no regard for me. Ihave started with regret over something any other way. How can I get spending less time with him you can’t change. SSW past this continuous issue? because of it because I don’t - PROBLEM TRUSTING IN want him to think I condone ACROSS CALIFORNIA his racist language. Is it time to Dear Abby is written by Abigail 1 Group, Current puzzle answers sever ties with Matt? — DISAP- Van Buren, also known as Jeanne disparagingly DEAR PROBLEM TRUST- POINTED IN MARYLAND Phillips, and was founded by her 4 Places a call on ABE] MEISE! BENE ING: The most effective way to mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact an old phone ANNE ERDNE! SNE do that would be to talk about DEAR DISAPPOINTED: I Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com 9 Use a pair of MS! Seem SE think so. The next time Matt this destructive pattern with a licensed mental health adviser. uses the N-word, make clear or PO, Box 69440, Los Angeles, scissors SPERBO SMM 13 Pad — | Be NGS If you do, it may help you rid to him that if you ever hear it cA 90069. 14 Usher in 15 Flexible tube AlLIS[N[e/OMS|Gloloiw 16 “— callus...” Nivielyin S/S ainiv 17 Andes ruminant MEO) BORER NED 18 She, in Seville DME SEE! 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